A couple of days ago, Lucky Girl wrote a very smart post called My Rules of Attraction. Her basic premise is that physical attraction is important. Not the most important thing, but very important. Here’s how she sums it up:
“I think my point is that I can not think of an instance where I willingly compromised what I want in a partner because he was hot. But I can name a number of instances where I willingly compromised my physical attraction in hopes that the other stuff was enough. It wasn’t. And I learned my lesson. I need and deserve both. We all do.”
Smart chick, right!
First dates. Let’s face it, they’re weird. You get together with someone you don’t know (in my case, usually over drinks) to hang out/talk/get to know each other a little bit while you’re each thinking the same thing: Is this someone I want to have sex with?
Because, really, that’s what chemistry is. At it’s most basic level. And that’s the main thing most of us check for on first dates. Chemistry. Do I or don’t I want to fuck this person? Maybe not tonight (probably not tonight, if I want there to be future dates…) but eventually.
Sure, there are other things we check for too. I have my laundry list (kindness, a great dad if he has kids, smart as hell…). We all have our laundry lists. But without chemisty I find it hard to get excited about seeing a guy again.
Which doesnt mean I won’t accept a second date if there’s no chemistry on the first. Sometimes I do. And I’m not sure why. Or if this is a good thing. Really, I’m pretty damn confused about it…
Anyway, I was kind of surprised by the results the last time I asked this question. Let’s see how things shake out this year.
Tags: attraction, kiss, lucky girl, poll, rules