I’m sorry. I’ve been saying that a lot lately.
Anyway, I do have a little story for today. One that I think most people can relate to. If they let themselves.
I got an email, not too long ago, from a friend. She was apologizing for being out of touch. Which I just thought was silly. Good friends never need to apologize for being out of touch. It happens. People get busy. Caught up in the details of their own lives. But the good friends are always there when you need them.
She then went on to say that she’s been massively sad and depressed. And hiding it from me and, I guess, just about everybody. She’d fallen in love with the wrong person. It was inappropriate. And accidental. Nothing she’d planned or wanted. It just happened.
And that, surprise, the guy in question was a total ass. Not worth her love.
I wrote back that she had nothing to be sorry for… And that I was here for her, always. And that I knew a lot about misplaced love. I’ve been very good, in the past, at loving the wrong guy. And that it takes time to recover from it but that the sadness does fade. Or something like that.
Funny (not funny) but I feel like I could be telling this same story (friend falls in love with inappropriate man and feels tragically depressed) about 3 or 4 different people I know. Change around the genders and the numbers go up.
Love is an action, sure. But it’s also a feeling. And sometimes people fall in love with the wrong people. We misplace our love. And once that happens it’s really hard to just stop. Feeling.
At least that’s been my experience. Maybe other people can just say to themselves, ‘he’s not worth it and as of today I’m not going to love him anymore’. But not me.
ps. M texted me on my birthday. I deleted it immediately and did not reply. That really is over. As my friend Jack from Brooklyn likes to remind me, the opposite of love isn’t hate. It’s indifference. I’m almost there.
Tags: friends, guy, heartache, love, sad